Invisi-Kids
by Danicus Green
Summary: Phineas, Ferb, and their friends turn invisible in order to sneak into a baseball game. Meanwhile, Doofensmhirtz has been getting richer and richer, and Perry must put a stop to it.


Invisi-kids

Phineas and Ferb were watching TV in their living room when Isabella came in. "Hey, Phineas. What'cha doin'?" she asked, as sweet usual.

"Oh, hi, Isabella! Ferb and I were just watching Ball Night Bloopers! It's this funny show where they make fun of athletes who act weird or totally drop the ball, no pun intended. And there's a lot of 'em tonight!"

"Not doing anything super or impossible before we go the game tonight?" Isabella asked, somewhat confused.

"Naw, we're just taking it easy until then." Phineas replied nonchalantly, he and Ferb slowly sinking into the couch to prove their point. Isabella shrugged and just hopped onto the couch to do the same.

There was going to be a big baseball game in Danville that evening. The Danville Dragons were facing off against the Tri-State Tigers, and it was the first time the Dragons had been to the national finals for the college league. It seemed like half of everyone Phineas and Ferb knew were going.

"So where are the tickets?" Isabella asked, after twenty minutes of watching athletes make fools of themselves.

"Oh, Baljeet and Buford offered to go them." Phineas answered, looking at his watch. "In fact, they should be here right about now.

Just then, the back door opened and Buford and a rather tired-looking Baljeet entered the room.

"Did you guys get the tickets?" Phineas asked, not noticing them in either boys' hands. Buford suddenly looked startled.

"Uh…yeah…the tickets…" he muttered. "Well, the bad news is, we didn't make it to the stadium in time buy tickets before they were all sold out."

Phineas tried not to panic. "Well, what's the good news?" he asked nervously.

Buford grinned. "I gave Baljeet a wedgie up the flagpole at the school! You shoulda seen it! It was awesome!" Buford then burst into a cruel guffaw as Baljeet fainted.

"Aw, too bad!" Candace mocked from the other room. "I guess you twerps will be missing a great game. Stacy and I going to the game. And so is Jeremy, and Jenny, and like everyone else!"

The kids ignored her, instead trying to figure out what to do. "Oh I've been waiting so long for this! What are we gonna do? We can't just watch it on TV! It wouldn't be the same!" Phineas complained.

"Gosh, Phineas. I can't see any way through this." Isabella lamented.

"Can't…see…?" Phineas muttered thoughtfully. "That's it! Ferb, I know what we're gonna do today! You guys go home! And meet us at the outskirts of the stadium in two hours."

"Go home? Can't we help you?" Isabella asked.  
"Sorry, this'll be a little more risky than usual. Just trust me on this."  
"Should we bring anything when we meet up?" Baljeet asked.  
"Nothing but the clothes on your backs!" Phineas stated. "By the way, where'd Perry go?"

Meanwhile, Perry the Platypus had snuck out of the house and into his secret lair beneath the home. "Good Morning Agent P!" Monogram greeted. "A couple days ago, Dr. Doofenshmirtz opened up a new bank account and deposited his monthly alimony check into it. Ever since then, the amount of money has doubled several times each evening. We've concluded that he is obtaining this wealth by gambling, and we sorta glossed over it, thinking his luck would run out. But that hasn't happened yet, and by the way things are going, it's not stopping. His account currently stands at $512,000. He's just one bet away from becoming a millionaire. Who knows what he plans to do with all of that money?" Monogram shivered. "We need you to trail Doofenshmirtz, find out why he's so lucky, and put a stop to it. We _cannot_ have such a well-funded evildoer in our town!" Perry saluted, ran to his hovercraft and took off.

Later that afternoon, Isabella, Baljeet and Buford arrived at the Danville Baseball stadium and lurked in a grove of bushes behind right-field waiting for Phineas and Ferb. Their wait was short, fortunately, as the two boys arrived only two minutes after the others, with Ferb holding a small bag.

"Ladies and gentlemen!" Phineas greeted. "May we present to you, Invisi-gum!" Ferb held out the bag allowed the group to look inside. Inside were a few dozen glowing red gumballs. The three stared in awe. "We just chew on one of these babies for a minute or so, and we'll be invisible to the naked eye for the next three hours, which should be enough time to sneak in, watch the game all the way through, and sneak back out."

"Sweet!" Buford exclaimed. "We can be like spies or criminals or superheroes! We can do all kids of cool stuff with that!"

"Um… sure, but maybe later, Buford. We're just here to watch a baseball game." Phineas replied.  
"Uh, Phineas," said Baljeet. "Do you know that it lasts for three hours because you've performed extensive testing and trials on them?"

"Well, no. We didn't have time to test them." Phineas admitted. "But don't worry, it's foolproof. Right, Ferb?" Phineas turned to Ferb, who gave a supportive nod.

Suddenly, baseball music started to play. "OK, the game's about to start. It's exactly 5 PM! Everyone take a piece and start chewing!" The group all reached into the bag and tossed a piece of gum into their mouths. As they started chewing, a smile came across Baljeet's face.

"Mm! Fruity!" he exclaimed.  
"With subtle hints of cherry and motor oil." Buford agreed. Isabella almost asked how he knew what motor oil tasted like, but she noticed that her fingers were slowly disappearing from sight.

"It's working, Phineas!" she praised excitedly.  
"Just like we planned!" Phineas replied proudly, as his hands disappeared.

"Hello? Can you guys still hear me? Or am I invisible, too?" Buford asked, his arms completely disappearing.  
"We are turning invisible, Buford, not inaudible." Baljeet said, rolling his invisible eyes.

Within a minute, everyone in the group had completely vanished. However, there was a problem…

"Phineas!" Isabella shouted. "Our clothes are still visible!" It was true. The gum had failed to spread to anyone's clothes making them look like haunted, walking outfits, when they weren't supposed to look like anything at all.  
"Uh-oh! The gum doesn't have any effect on our clothes! We must've overlooked that, Ferb!"  
"It's OK!" Buford said. "We'll just squeeze the juice from these gumballs on our clothes!"  
"Um, that's not gonna work…"

But Buford ignored Phineas and grabbed another gumball. He squeezed the juice onto his shirt, but it just ended up leaving a big red stain. "Aw, come on!" he wailed. "Well, at least my shirt is black." He then dropped the gumball back into the bag.

"We can't go in there like this! We'll be caught and thrown out!" Baljeet shouted.

"It appears we've neglected a proper element in our formula that would allow the pigment of our clothing to be drained alongside the pigment of our epidermis. I can see that further testing and development is necessary." Ferb stated, patting his clothes.

"Hey, hey, guys, this no problem!" Phineas proclaimed optimistically. Everyone turned to look at him. "We just have to remove the stuff that's still visible!" For a moment, everyone did a good impression of Ferb.

"You mean… our clothes?" Isabella asked shyly.  
"You expect us to sneak into a stadium full of people, completely naked?" Buford asked. "This should be an interesting addition to my Nightmare Repertoire."  
"No way, Phineas!" said Baljeet. "No one, not even me, sees me naked!"  
"But that's the whole point, Baljeet!" Phineas replied. "The only way no one's going to able to see us is if we take our clothes off."

The game was about to start, and Phineas was determined to see it. "Look I'm going in there, with or without you guys." Phineas said harshly. Suddenly, Isabella turned around started walking away. "Wait, where are you going?" he asked, fearing that Isabella was calling his bluff.

"I'm going into the other bushes to undress. A girl does need her privacy." She explained, plucking her bow from her hair.

"Oh, OK." Phineas sighed in relief. He and Buford then took off their shirts while Ferb dropped his trousers and Baljeet undid his overalls. Within two minutes everyone had stripped down completely and Isabella had rejoined the group.

"I just realized something." Said Buford "How are _we_ going to see each other? What with us being all invisible and stuff?"

"Not to worry, Buford!" said Phineas. "Ferb and I made these little rings with insects on them. That way, we'll be able to see where we are, and ward off people who might come running into us.

Ferb then handed out rings with plastic but very realistic-looking hornets and flies to everyone. The handoff was a bit tricky, but it was accomplished.

"Alright, we're all set. Let's go." Phineas then crawled through a hole in the fence, with his brother and friends following closely behind. They made their way along the side of the baseball diamond and up into the uppermost row of the bleachers.

"Ooh! Chilly!" Isabella and Baljeet cooed as they sat down on the cold metal bleachers.  
"Quiet, guys! We can't let anyone know we're here! Especially Candace." Phineas whispered loudly. Normally, he couldn't care less about what Candace would do about their crazy schemes, but this was not a situation he wanted to be caught in.  
"Speak of the Devil, and she shall appear." Baljeet said, pointing. Sure enough, Candace, Stacy, Jeremy, Jenny, and Coltrane were all coming up the stairs, and it looked like they were headed to sit where Phineas and Ferb's group were already seated. "Bad luck, huh?"

"Leave this to me!" Buford whispered. Sure enough, the group of teens unknowingly headed straight for them.

"Aw! Eek!" Candace and Stacy shouted.  
"What's wrong, girls?" Jeremy asked.  
"Our seats are infested flies and bees!" Candace yelled.  
"Those are hornets, not bees." Jenny corrected.  
"Whatever!"  
"Hey, hey, calm down, Candace, I'll just shoo 'em off." Jeremy offered.  
"Uh-oh." thought Phineas, Isabella, and Baljeet.

Jeremy reached over and started fanning his hand over the insect rings when Buford suddenly grabbed his wrist and started swinging him around like a doll. He was bashed into the bleachers and the walls behind Buford multiple times, before he was stood up, at which point Buford clobbered him in the stomach and face, and then gave him an uppercut, causing him to fall over back into the aisle. Both groups stared at Jeremy in shock.

"OMIGOSH! JEREMY!" Candace shrieked, quickly coming to his side.  
"Are you alright, man? What happened?" asked Coltrane.  
"O-o-o-oh…" Jeremy moaned. "That fly kicked my butt."  
"That's one tough fly!" Stacy commented.  
"Maybe we should just let the creatures be," Jenny suggested. "Let's just sit in the row in front of them."

The teens then filed into the row below the kids, the latter all sighing silently in relief. Phineas made a mental note to tell Buford that he owed Jeremy an apology later.

"And with the game about to start, there's the Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated Blimp!" the announcer announced.

 _Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated!_

Perry crashed through the window of Dr. Doofenshmirtz's airship, but the evil doctor was nowhere to be found at first. The platypus searched around for about a minute, when suddenly, Doofenshmirtz appeared out of thin air with a net gun prepped and ready for firing. He quickly fired, trapping Perry a weighted net.

"Hya-hya, ha-ha-ha!" he cackled. "Oh, look what I caught! Aw, but it looks like it's under the legal size limit. I guess I'll have to throw it back!" Doofenshmirtz then hung Perry out the window, threatening to drop him. "Ha-ha! Psych!" Doof pulled Perry back in. "So, Perry the Platypus, I bet you're wondering where I got the money to purchase yet another dirigible. Well it all started a week ago, when I was watching Back to the Future Part 2. I had the genius idea to start gambling in order to make more money, because with gambling, you don't have to do anything but win. Easy money! That is if you're lucky. And if you know me, you'd know that I'm usually the opposite of lucky. So I invented this: the Gamblinator!" Doof held up a gun shaped like a giant purple hairdryer. "I know what you're thinking: It's a device that will predict the outcome of sports games like the almanac in the movie! Well I was planning on building something like that, but it just didn't seem evil enough. This is just a portable version of my Amnesia-Inator. It shoots an invisible ray that makes whoever it hits get the rules of whatever sport they're playing mixed up. My targets are usually the star players on the team favored to win. That way, I always win in an upset! And as a bonus, I get to watch my handiwork on Ball Night Bloopers the next day!" Perry chattered indistinctly, but Doofenshmirtz seemed to know what he meant. "Oh I was just down placing my bet at the local casino. This time, they only let me bet $500,000. Apparently, they have betting limits down there. I'm surprised I haven't been banned from there yet. I've been giving them quite a beating, lately. Perhaps they think they'll get lucky and earn their money back. In that case, not a chance! Or maybe it's because I'm usually the only one who bets on the underdog. Who knows? But no matter. All we have to do is wait for the most opportune moment to ruin it for the Danville Dragons! And then I'll be a millionaire!"

Despite the current situation Phineas and company were in, they were having a legitimately fun time. Both baseball teams were showing great skill and grace. There was a home run, a triple play, and four strikeouts in the first two innings alone. The game seemed evenly matched, whenever the Tigers scored a run in the top half of any inning, the Dragons would match the score in the bottom half. The kids were very careful to cheer or boo only when everyone else did.

During the top half of the fourth inning, the teens went down to get some concessions, allowing the kids to discuss the highlights in their normal voices. But while they did so, they noticed that Buford was still being rather quiet.

"Buford? What'd ya think of Arthur Garfield's home run? Buford?" Phineas asked.  
"He is not here, Phineas!" Baljeet yelled worriedly while waving his hand to his right, where Buford had been sitting.  
"Wha-Where is he?"

Suddenly, there was a crash halfway down the aisle. A food vendor had tripped and sent his good flying downward into the crowd. Hot dogs, popcorn, candy and soda pelted several fans, and one cup of soda nailed Candace in the head as she and her friends were coming back up. Phineas didn't know whether to laugh or cry out in concern, but he was strong enough to do neither.

While those that got hit with food admonished the vendor, several opportunistic fans made a grab for many of the snacks that were spilled. Several snacks started floating in midair and began moving toward Phineas and the gang.

"Hey, guys!" said Buford. "You want something to eat?"  
"Buford, did you trip that vendor?" Baljeet asked in a scolding tone.  
"It …may have been an accident on purpose." Buford admitted sheepishly. "Look do you want popcorn or do you want another flagpole wedgie?!" Baljeet took some popcorn. Isabella and Ferb took the hot dogs. Phineas grabbed some candy. No one said any more than Ferb on the matter.

The game was exciting, but the second half of the game seemed to be dragging on a little slower than usual. Eventually the warm summer air grew cool. Isabella scooted closer to Phineas to preserve body heat. She got a little too close for young Phineas, and he ended up scooting away from her in a cold sweat, leaving both of them very grateful that their faces were invisible.

Eventually, the star of the Danville Dragons, Arthur Garfield, stepped back up to the plate. Doofenshmirtz scowled. "There he is, the player of the game and the season! Well not anymore! My Gamblinator will cost you the game and make you look like a fool!" he declared. He fired the Gamblinator at Garfield. Perry then broke free from his trap and began brawling with Doofenshmirtz. The pitcher threw the ball, and Garfield struck it, causing it to veer off to the right as a foul ball. Nevertheless, Garfield began running around the bases in the wrong direction, much to the befuddlement of everyone.

Meanwhile the foul ball that he hit careened toward Phineas and the gang. "Oh a foul! I'm gonna catch it!" Jeremy proclaimed. Suddenly, Buford then kicked him in the back of the head and caught the ball for himself.

"Buford!" Phineas hissed.  
"What? I've always wanted to catch a foul ball!" Buford defended. "I've always felt I was destined for glory!"

"Phineas?" Candace uttered, looking behind her. The kids instantly went dead silent. Candace reached behind for one of the hornets, and felt a hand. Phineas's hand. He yanked it away from Candace, but it was too late. Candace knew. But instead of getting in their faces, Candace turned to Jeremy and said "Could you excuse me for a couple minutes? Thanks!" and ran off.

"And that's three outs!" cried the announcer. "Tigers six, and Dragons seven, coming into the top of the final inning!"

Candace ran around the entire stadium, searching for a hidden device that was keeping her brothers invisible. Eventually she came across the clearing that had discarded pieces of children's clothing laying around. Her eyes popped. She then spotted the bag of Invisi-gum. She picked it up read the label "Chew on this gum for 1 minute you shall become invisible to the naked eye for three hours." she read. "So that's it! Phineas and Ferb have used this invisibility gum sneak into the stadium and watch the game without paying! In the nude! Oh, they are so busted this time!" she said grinning insanely.

She gathered all of the kids discarded articles of clothing into one small area, took out her phone, and took a picture of them. "Now I just have to get Phineas and Ferb in the picture! Oh wait, I can't. They're invisible. How am I going to bust them when I can't even prove what they're doing?" Candace's eye then turned back to the Invisi-gum. "That's it! Maybe I'll be able to see them if I'm invisible too!" Without even stopping to think twice, Candace reached into the bag, pulled out a gumball, and popped it into her mouth. "Bleh! It tastes like motor oil!"

Candace vanished from sight. Once she did, she quickly recognized the flaw in Phineas and Ferb's Invisi-gum. "Oh, right. Forgot about _my_ clothes. Ok, no problem." Candace muttered, quickly undressing. She then climbed over the fence, as the hole in the bottom was too small for her.

At the exact same time, Ferb noticed the time on the board. He quickly elbowed Phineas and pointed at the clock, his fly ring making it possible to see what he was doing.

"Guys, we'd better get going!" Phineas whispered, urgently.  
"But, Phineas, the Tigers are down six to seven, and they've got the bases loaded!" Baljeet argued.  
"Yeah and Oliver Hobbes is up now!" Buford said supportively.  
"Guys, it's 7:57! The gum won't last much longer!" Phineas argued back, the clock turned to 7:58. "I don't know about you, but I'd rather be back in my clothes when I reappear. Wait, where's Isabella?"  
"I think she got a head start." said Buford. "I just felt her legs move past me."  
"Ew. Well, what are waiting for? Let's go!"

Meanwhile, back in the blimp, Doofenshmirtz had managed to get Perry off of him long enough to view the game. "Yes! Oh, yes! Oliver Hobbes is up! Once he hits that ball, I'll be a millionaire! Think of all the evil Inators I could build with that money! And even more evil, I'll still be getting alimony checks, even though I'm richer than my Ex-Wife! Ha-ha! Take _that,_ Charlene! Take _that,_ divorce laws!"

While Doofenshmirtz was monologuing, Perry grabbed the Gamblinator and the Net gun, unfolded his glider, and flew to the top of the scoreboard.

Candace had not noticed when Isabella ran passed her, shortly followed by Phineas, Ferb, Baljeet, and Buford, (in that order) nor did they see Candace. But Phineas could start to see Isabella slowly reappearing. Then he looked his hands and noticed that his fingertips were slowly becoming visible. "It's wearing off, guys! HURRY! GRAB YOUR CLOTHES!" Phineas shouted, not caring if he was heard anymore.

The children scrambled under the fence in a panic. Isabella had managed to pull on her shirt and panties, while the boys just managed to get their underwear on as the last effects of the gum wore off.

"Whew! That was close!" Phineas exclaimed. "Now where are my shorts?"

 _CRACK!_

Just as the kids were about to shift through the clothes pile, a loud crack of a wooden bat against a baseball ripped through the air like thunder, followed by the cheers and jeers of the crowd. They looked back into the baseball diamond.

"What just happened?" Isabella asked, nervously.  
"I think Oliver Hobbes just hit a homer! And it's coming over right field!" Buford shouted.  
"But that's where we are!" Baljeet pointed out.  
"Everyone, dive for the bushes!" Phineas yelled.  
"We are so busted…" uttered Ferb.

Now Perry knew that two wrongs did not make a right, but for the sake of the Tri-State Area, the Tigers had to lose. Perry fired the Gamblinator, but purposefully did not hit anything. Then he fired the net gun at the pop fly that Oliver Hobbes had just hit. The invisible ray from the Gamblinator was meant as a cover for the weighted net. The ball stopped in midair and started falling to where the Dragons' right-fielder was able to catch it.

"Three outs! That's game! DRAGONS WIN!" yelled the announcer.  
"CURSE YOU, PERRY THE PLATYPUS!" screamed Doofenshmirtz. And then he sighed. "I guess I should have quit while I was ahead. Oh well, at least I still have $12,000. Maybe those betting limits were a good thing."

Phineas and company all sighed in relief, and got dressed without any further inconveniences. That is, until a police officer noticed them.

"OK, kids no spectatin' unless you have tickets!" she called. "Run along now!"  
"Sorry, Officer. We'll leave right away." Phineas called grabbing the bag of Invisi-gum.  
"Thank you." The officer said, tipping her hat.  
"Um, Phineas? Aren't those Candace's clothes?" Isabella asked, pointing. All eyes turned to a neatly folded red shirt, white skirt and shoes.  
"Uh, it looks like them. She must've taken a piece of gum. Wonder what's she's doing."

Suddenly, there came a ruckus from within the stadium. A couple dozen people were screaming, including Candace. There was no mistaking it. To Phineas and Ferb, Candace's scream was recognizable as Spongebob's laugh.

The kids ran around to the front of the stadium where they saw two police officers escorting a visible and naked Candace (now covered in a blanket) out.  
"Listen, kid, no one likes wearing clothes in public, but hey, it's the law." said one of the officers  
"But- but- but- but- but- but- but- but-" stuttered a shocked and humiliated-looking Candace.

"Huh, that gum must worn off prematurely. I wonder why." Phineas commented.  
"Well, maybe it doesn't work as well on teens and adults." Isabella offered.  
"Nah, I doubt it."  
"Maybe she got a dud." Buford pondered.  
"Again, doubtful."  
"Maybe she ate the piece that Buford squeezed all the juice out on his shirt." Baljeet hypothesized.

"Maybe… I guess we should be glad that wasn't us, though. We've had so many close calls this summer. I hate to say it, but we might be get in trouble one of these days if we're not careful."


End file.
